I don't know how long it has been since I've written anything in this Journal. I've been in a zone of work and play, but not really wanting to share any of what I do with the few hundred people who make it a ritual to check the pages of the crazy world of the man with heavy metals in his brain stem.

I went on vacation for two weeks, would have liked to have made it the rest of my life. The first week I felt nothing for anything. No meaning, no center, just happy to make a ritual of surfing in the morning by myself, surfing in the afternoon with my kid and taking a long walk in the early evening on the beach with Courtney. Somewhere around day five, I decided to get drunk. Not stumbling into a certain death  with no care kind of drunk scenario, but it was well past my two beer limit that I set on myself. Courtney and Pierson had gone to sleep and I was left to the silence of the night with no chaperone. After beer four, I went to Howards Pub and had beer five. After Mr. Five in the lovely little green bottle was drained I heard a really old voice in that crusty brain telling me to go on an adventure.

I got on my bike and rode to the beach. Parking the bike I kicked the sandals off and ventured down a very dark beach. Waves were lit only by the light of the very bright Milky way,  while little phosphorescent things on the beach washed in and out with the waves giving me a good idea of the tide mark, and I was alone. After walking sometime down the beach I took a seat to stare at the stars. There were way too many to ignore just how small life is, how stupid humans problems were, and a faint notion of wanting to escape to a different planet all crept into my mind. (The escape part won't happen anytime soon but hopefully when I do die God and my Karma will have something nice to say and I'll be a jeweler again. I like being a jeweler.)

My vacation and life have been different after seeing the stars again. I mean really seeing the stars. So few places I seen a view like this. Colorado way in the back country with Porter one summer, and on Kalalau Beach in Kauai. This insane magnitude of our universe puts things into perspective and I hope that this view, this "center" or meaning stays with me at least until after the Christmas season.

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